Food in video games always looks tastier than it🐎 does in real life. As a co🐭oking lover myself, I always strive to make something look as good as it does in a video game. A fruitless goal, perhaps, but my goal nonetheless.
But what makes video game food so enticing? Is it the perfect way it's rendered - devoid of imperfections? No, I'd argue not. For m☂e, what makes food in games so appealing is the lack of realism behind it. There are delicacies you can find in games that s🐽imply can't be had in real life. That's the appeal - that unattainable taste and satiation.
With all this being said, here are some of my favorite v♍ideo game foods.
Wall Meat (Castlevania)
Ah, the beloved wall meꦦat.🐷 It's hard to top this one.
Imagine walking down a dark, empty alley at 1:29 AM. You'reღ a little tipsy, a few blocks from your car, and getting munch-y. In the shadows, you see it - a crack in a brick wall, just asking to be broken. With a nearby 2 X 4, you pound away at the wal🦩l until the smell of tender, roasted meat wafts up to you.
The wall meat is a beautiful fantasy. Homecooked meat hidden away in walls, just waiting to be gobbled up by those lucky enough to find it. What meat is it? What's it seasoned with? That doesn't matter. It's wall meat.൲ It's a delicacy. You don't question it, you just accept its tender, juicy glory in that dark alley. Just look out for Medusas.
The Pickles (Deadly Premonition)
You can eat pickles. You can get those anywhere. But those are just pickles - various brands all trying to one-up each other, w♐hile basically selli♋ng the same thing. Well, except for Bubby's and Wickles - those are just delicious.
But Deadly Premonition offers up something definitive: The Pickles. Not "a" pickle, not "some" pickles - the pickles. What makes these 🃏so special? Are they truly the end-all, be-all pickle experience? Why are they in a can, and not a jar? We don't know. They're mysterious, elusive, sexy, and we just want to put them in our mouths.
But we can't. And that's why they're great.
Literally Anything Cooking Mama Makes
This needs almost no explanation.
Cooking Mama is the perfect escapist fantasy. Mama's a prett𝓰y, accomplished woman who guides you through complex recipes with a soothing voice and encouraging words. By the end of each session, you're left with a masterpiece made by your own hands, but shaped by Mama's direction.
Think, th🦩en, of what ඣher own cooking must be like. The mind boggles.
Cup Noodle (Final Fantasy XV)
Oh, sure, we have Cup Noodle in the real world. You can get that at any grocery store, gas station, or dorm. But whatever earthshaking, mind-altering variety of Cup Noodle exists in Final Fantasy XV's world clearly doesn't in ours.
It's a food that Daddyolus... erm, Gladiolus craves more than any other. He goes nuts for the stuff, and ranks it above his friends' own cooking. No sane human in our society would have a similar reaction to it, which is why I can only conclude that XV's Cup Noodle is much better than our own.
What's the deal? Does it use real broth, and not that powdered stuff? Are there freshly chopped veggies in eꦅvery cup? Are the noodles made from scratch? I want to know, and I want to eat.
A Literal Human Being (Maneater)
I✅'ve heard of looking like a snack, but this is ridiculous.
Look, let's level for a moment: Maneater makes people look pretty tasty. Just look at the way the titular shark gobbles th𝐆em up like potato chips! They're tasty morsels that the shark keeps munching away at, like 𝕴I do a bag of white cheddar SmartFood. If they're so edible, and so compelling to keep crunching away at, there must be something to them.
Don't worry, 𝕴I'm not going to go full Issei Sagawa or anything. That's the point of this article - to highlight the beauty of video game food, and its fleeting, temporal lack of tangibility. I can't eat a human. I can't eat Cup Noodle without putting spices in it. I can't have a Cooking Mama in my life. But video games let me fulfill that fantasy.